For some reason, most of you don’t have the DIY Network. I won’t say you should be ashamed of yourselves, but this isn’t anything to be proud of either because you’re going to miss the renewal of the best flip series in the world, to wit, The Vanilla Ice Project.
I don’t know what this season has in store. Probably Wes Kane will be back as Rob’s right hand man. Unless the earth has turned incorrectly on its axis, Jeremy the College Kid should also be a regular. The identities of the rest of the crew are a mystery, but they may be pretty good. I don’t see how they can be as great as Pork Chop, Handsome Dan, George the Plumber, or other erstwhile cast members, but I could be surprised.
What I can count on is very high-end house flipping the likes of which no one has ever surpassed. The bling will be mighty, and I don’t doubt that Rob will bring his usual ingenuity to every crisis. Over the course of an unspecified number of weeks, prepare to watch a hopeless wreck of a mansion go from zero to hero. Kitchens will be destroyed and rebuilt with state-of-the-art accessories. Swimming pools full of unspeakable detritus will be transformed into sparkling water attractions. Tiki huts will almost certainly be fabricated on white sand beaches. Yard flora will rival the gardens of bygone sultans.
If you don’t watch any other do-it-yourself flip show this season, you owe it to yourself to be awed by the VIP Ninjas. Send word to your mother.
(I’m supposed to give credit for the photo, so here goes: By Dave Kleinschmidt from Williamstown, MA – Is this real? Cropped from original image., CC BY-SA 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=2558759)
Like most “reality” shows, it’s based on an aspirational fantasy that none of their viewership is ever going to achieve. House flipping. LOL. Assuming that in this economy you have the capital to acquire and remodel an abandoned or derelict property, where’s your market supposed to come from? Obama keeps telling us how we’re in a recovery but what he fails to acknowledge that it’s only when you average in the bankers who are doing better than they’ve ever done with their too-big-to-fail banks bigger than before the bailouts.
Vanilla Ice: Gentrification for Celebrities
Wooo!
That’s pretty harsh, I like Vanilla Ice….
Yeah, I don’t disagree with the fantasy aspect or the distance from most people’s reality. Also, most real house flippers are scum trying to get rich quick by tossing something together you couldn’t safely inhabit for more than six weeks. The fun thing about VIP is that it’s so far beyond the reach of real home-buyers and flippers that you don’t care. You just want to see what a lot of money can do in the hands of people who privilege insane opulence over taste and common sense.
Normal people can’t afford (and probably don’t want) a gaudy faux Renaissance ceiling painting in their kitchen, complete with fat cherubs fluttering around in poofy clouds. I always expect to see a bikini-clad Emily Blunt stepping out of a giant clamshell. But it doesn’t matter. Only drug lords and sheiks are going to pay for jeweled cabinet hardware and all that other lunatic bling VI tacks on to everything.
That’s the appeal of the show. It’s unapologetically over the top, crazy in its vulgarity. You have to love it.
I hadn’t watched it and didn’t realize it was even worse than most flipping shows. Ugh.
I guess it depends on your point of view. VIP takes the flipping concept and cranks it so high that it exceeds absurdity. I guess in that sense it’s worse — much, much worse.
Well I didn’t mean to poop on what you like Sim. Sorry. 🙂
Just feeling a little cynical about the state of our society these days. 😛 Not YOU, but people. 😛
I welcome your pooping and completely agree that flipping shows are a symptom of something worse. VIP is the only show like that I can stand.